one last post from Namibia

About a month ago, I had a memorable dream.

My Peace Corps term had recently ended, and I was back in the United States, at a job that had a cafeteria in the building.  It was our lunch break.  I went into the cafeteria and was floored by what I saw.

Long, long lines of people — crowds of people — and long lines of banquet tables.  There was an endless variety of food to choose from, with servants at each station, ready to explain what each dish was and spoon out an amount for you.  There was a meat station with a dozen different kinds — meatballs, chicken, steak, pork, ham, turkey, venison….  I was overwhelmed by all the food.

And then I overheard someone say, “There’s nothing to eat here.”

I felt awful.

I felt so sad…that this was my life now.  I was back in a place of unimaginable abundance, but nobody was aware of it.

Today I start the long journey, halfway around the world, to visit the U.S. for the first time since August 2010.  As excited as I am, I also feel real fear about what it will be like to be back.  (Maybe that sounds overdramatic, but when a fellow volunteer visited home — even sooner in her term than I am — she reported back in a dazed voice: “Everything was…so…fast.”)  So I am a little worried.  There may be reverse culture shock.  I may struggle with judgmentalism.  And, I may even turn into the person who voiced that complaint in my dream: I might start to take it all for granted again.

I pray God will surround me with safety, an attitude of gratitude, humility, and openness during the next month.  I will likely need a lot of grace.

5 Responses

  1. You will be surrounded by prayers and love, and always by the grace of God. Have a safe journey and a very blessed Christmas.

    “Grace is available for each of us every day – our spiritual daily bread – but we’ve got to remember to ask for it with a grateful heart and not worry about whether there will be enough for tomorrow.” – Sarah Ban Breathnach

  2. The wisdom you have at your age is amazing. I like your attitude of gratitude. Your prayer and thought over your journey back home will see you through. Be where you are are, accept where you are, and be gratefu for where you are. God bless you , Sarah. Kim

  3. Peace be with you throughout your re-entry and visit! The worst part will be the airports. Hah! Even if you’ve been living here the worst part would be the airports. I assume you are going to Homer where the greatest change will be the temperature. Thank goodness for the warmth of the family homecoming. Wish we could see you to hear more stories. Have a great Christmas……and enjoy the bountiful food without bugs!

    Bob and Carol

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